Horn broken. Watch for finger.
Cover me. I'm changing lanes.
Learn from your parents' mistakes - use birth control.
Forget about World Peace...Visualize using your turn signal.
We have enough youth; how about a fountain of Smart?

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
Rehab is for quitters.
All men are idiots, and I married their King.
Jack Kevorkian for White House Physician.

Work is for people who don't know how to fish.
Montana-At least our cows are sane!
I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.
Few women admit their age; Fewer men act it.
I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.

IRS: We've got what it takes to take what you've got.
It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.
Reality? Is that where the pizza delivery guy comes from?
Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear.
Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere may be happy.

Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder...
Why is 'abbreviation' such a long word?
Ever stop to think and forget to start again?
Keep honking...I'm reloading.